Million Dollar Man
by Miss Nae Malfoy
Summary: Jacob cut me off with a hard look. "I will give you the funds necessary to repair your family debt- and you will give me a warm bed and a soft smile." As he said these things, I shut my eyes against the creeping humiliation and guilt that came along with an arrangement like this. I was bought to be his companion for the next 12 months, to pick up where we left off four years ago.
1. Chasing Our Dreams

I promised myself that no matter what happened today, I would still be able to walk away with my dignity. This wasn't your average, everyday business deal between a desperate woman and a resourceful man. I was doing this for my father, because I knew there was no other way. Working at Newton's Creamery was not paying the bills that we owed, and it was only a matter of time before my father's debts would overwhelm us to the point of no return. We had no more than a month to get ourselves together, and I would be damned if I let our family house go along with other assets. My father worked damn hard for everything we had, no bank or government department deserved what he earned! There was the mid-sized fishing boat, the two pickup trucks that my dad worked endlessly on to get running again, and the big screen TV he bought on impulse right after retiring. Not that he stayed _retired _for very long… within the same year, he was back on part-time at the station. "He'll see you now." A woman with cropped blonde hair spoke to me without looking away from her laptop screen.

I nodded quickly and walked through the cherry wood double doors with squared shoulders and a soft expression. We grew up together, from puberty through college, we had been off and on… with that kind of past behind us, there was no way he'd just turn me down, right? We had history, and I had done him a million favors before- now I was calling on a favor of my own. He would at least hear me out, I would not leave until at least then! As soon as the door behind me closed, I stepped through a tall threshold and there he was, with his back to me chattering into a cell phone angrily. "No, I will not accept another canceled meeting. I do not _care _that he had a family emergency, we made a gentleman's agreement and I have showed nothing but patience between our two companies." His voice was smooth, but those shoulders of his looked hard as a rock. This was the first time in almost six years that I've seen him, and boy had he changed! "A ballet recital is no emergency, Mr. Dawson, and so I am severing any ties that Dawson Suppliers and Mason & Black have. We do not wish to akin ourselves to any corporation willing to neglect a business meeting over a child's play." And with that, he hung up his sleek touch screen phone and turned around sharply.

Well, that was just awful! Maybe I hadn't counted all of my beans before stepping foot in this thirty-story building… perhaps this wasn't the Jacob Black I was pining for. "Bella." He said my name oddly, as if he hadn't been briefed by his rude secretary outside. "When Kaycee said an Isabella was waiting outside… I just didn't expect you to ever come visit me." Those words stung in a weird way; no, I never had the heart or the guts to come visit him here, especially during work, and now that I was, I was here with an ulterior motive. Did that make me a bad person? "You look great." A small smile churned Jake's stoic face into a softer look.

"Thank you." I blushed a deep red at his open compliment. That was one aspect that made me fall in love with him at 16, he was always so open about his thoughts and feelings. "You, too." I said shyly. He did- every muscle in his body seemed to grow twice their size from the last time I was face-to-face with him! "I don't really know how I got the nerve to come here… but here I am." I added awkwardly. Why would I admit something like that to him? I wanted to come off cool, calm, collected, and completely casual about everything. That façade didn't look like it would have much life.

"And I'm glad you came." Jake smiled boyishly at me and went around his black, wooden desk before enveloping me in one of those crazily-comforting, suffocating hugs. Oh man, when was the last time I felt so cared for and protected? He always had that drawl over me, I could never get enough of his closeness. Between the loving hug, his expensive cologne invading my nostrils like the German troops, and my nervousness, I was a ball of emotions. I wanted to break down and spill all of my troubles out in the open for him to asses, and part of me willed myself to separate from his arms and treat him like I would nay other businessman that I needed borrowed money from. "What do you need from me, Bella?" He asked softly.

Where was that evil man on the telephone at? When we separated but he did not let go of me, I realized that I couldn't do this. I would have to get the money some other way. "Nothing." I said sourly and cleared my throat to dispel myself of the painful lump forming there. "I just wanted to say hi and see how you were doing." I lied easily, but by the conspicuous look on his face, I knew he saw right through it. I was an awful liar, anyway. Instead of grueling me for the answer, he simply nodded and gestured to a chair beside me and I sat accordingly. What did I ever do to deserve to have someone like this in my life? Given, we had gone through our fair amount of painful misunderstandings and a gap of some years without speaking… but still, he didn't throw me out and lock the doors. Smiling and offering to make me a mimosa was definitely not along my expectations. "No, thank you. I don't drink during the day anymore… I'm not seventeen, I don't bounce back easily." I added teasingly. When he and I were younger, drinking liquor was like guzzling down water. Nowadays… wine gave me headaches, the thought of shots made my stomach churn, and cheap beer brought back that oh-so-familiar gag reflex.

"You always were a bit of a lightweight, Bells." He chided. Where we grew up, it rained for seven eighths of the year and nothing _ever_ happened- drinking, bonfires, chilly beach days, and driving was all you could really do out there. Jake was four years older than me, so he finished high school and college before me, but I was always right there with him. I couldn't remember the exact first moment we met, but it was around the time my mom left me with my dad- and she never came back. I was starting middle school, he was starting his second year at high school. I was always very mature and developed into a woman early… I turned twelve as soon as he turned sixteen. Our story was long and complicated. "Oh, man." Jake shook his head, and gone was his long, shiny black mass of locks- he was suited up and put together, along with a short crew cut. It was sort of startling. "Do you think about our childhood often?"

That question hit me like a bucket of ice water. Of course I thought about our childhood, all of the time. "Yeah, sometimes." I fibbed only halfway. "What is there to think about?" I turned the tables on him. He took a seat next to me, not behind the desk like I thought he would. We were sitting so close that the side of my exposed right knee was rubbed up against his own. We didn't necessarily part on the best grounds when - I broke a lot of his things, he put his hands on me, our fathers got into their own feud over us; it was very safe to say that this meeting was a crazy miracle.

Jacob's self-absorbed smile sent butterflies scattering through my stomach. The only person he loved more than me was himself. "I think about growing up from nothing and being here now… I think about us- and the hell we used to raise." That made me smile. We _were _capable of raising hell back then in our shitwater town of Forks, Washington… the local bad asses, taking part in a completely taboo relationship. "What comes to mind when you think about us?" I used to love when he referred to he and I by "us"- it made me feel loved and finally a part of something. Now, I wasn't so sure if I liked remembering an "us".

I told myself to play dumb and spurt out some little details, or even one of the many good times we had. Instead, I told the truth. "I think about Diver's Cliffs, and that fight in your room, and then about when Billy and Charlie were ready to kill one another with fishing poles." It was stupid to bring that up again, after all of these years, but I thought about it nonstop. That argument wasn't the only thing I thought about, either… there were other parts, dangerous/psychotic ones, that I thought about. Like how he was super organized and verbally attacked anyone who disturbed that, too put together, completely obsessive over many matters- like how I dressed, what others thought of him, and my overall faith in our relationship. For being such an attractive man, he sure was insecure.

That was one leading factor to our final breakup. "Yeah." Jake replied dejectedly. "I sure am glad that we settled everything before it got out of hand." My jaw was nearly on the floor. We didn't settle anything and things _did _get out of hand! How exactly did he remember the argument going? Despite all of my real feelings, I pushed it aside and nodded with a bright little smile.

"Of course, Jake." I added fake kindness for the effect. "What I said earlier- that was a lie, I did come to you for something. And I feel really awful for it… I mean, I never thought I'd actually… you know, never mind-" Though I had practiced my speech for days on end, memorizing every line and thinking of a comeback or witty statement for everything he could have come up, I was stumbling over my words like a drunken fool. Jacob Black's hand somehow found its way to my bare knee, and there he was rubbing soothing circles around the boney cap. I idly wondered if he remembered doing that same thing for three weeks on end after a particular nasty spill on our dirt bikes my senior year.

"How much, Bella?" Jake had a pleasant look on his face, which was the polar opposite reaction I expected. He seemed to be exceeding every one of my expectations today! It was as if he expected me any day to come waltzing through his office door, asking for money like a poor beggar.

"What?" I asked in fear that I'd heard wrong.

Jake leaned in and pressed the smallest kiss on my cheek before pulling away and capturing my eyes in one of his famous stares. "You gave me everything you had, Bella, when I had nothing at all to offer you. Now that I have everything of possible use at my fingertips, I want that privilege to be available to you, also." I smiled shyly at his meaning. I was his girlfriend, on and off, for a good few years of our life. I gave him my virginity when I was sixteen, I fed him the last scraps of food from my fridge when his dad couldn't afford his hefty diet, I used my graduation money to bail him out of jail when he was arrested… he grew up poor, on a starving Indian Reservation until he left for college for a few years, and when he came back to say his "final goodbyes" he had just a few dollars to his name. I gave him my entire heart and soul that day on Diver's Cliffs, he took that and left, too. "So how much money are you in need of?"

This was so overwhelming. Tears started at my eyes and I begged them to control themselves; how weak was I going to look in front of Jake? We were both grown ups now, we weren't supposed to break down and cry over money problems. "I never did any of that with expectations of something in return." I stated clearly. He was not going to get away with thinking that I gave myself and my last dollar with wanting anything in return… I was taught that if you had, share it.

"I know that, Bells, that's why I am so willing to help you. You never expected a damn thing from anyone." Jake took my hand and placed random kisses all over it, just like he used to when he was trying to rouse me out of a bad mood. "Independent, headstrong, silly Isabella." He was possibly the only one, lest my dad, that could get away with calling me by my full name. "It's been three years, and not one thing has changed about you. I love that." I smiled weakly in return. Why was he touching me like this? We weren't together anymore, there was actually a man that I was currently interested in… and I doubted Mike would appreciate the way another man (especially one that I was involved with in my past) was putting his hands all over me. "Tell you what- join me for dinner and we can hash out all of the details there?"

God only knew why I was so excited when he invited me. I was supposed to be madly in love with Michael Newton, the local celebrity in Forks. There should have been more hesitation to my answer when I opened my big mouth, but I was still so very stupid around him. "That sounds good." I even blushed like a red fool. "What time?"

Jake raised an eyebrow at his silver Rolex and shot me a crooked smile. How many panties had gone wet with that one glance? Now, at twenty-four, I was still not immune to it. "How does right now sound?" I sent him a shaky look. It was eleven o clock in the morning, near noon, where were we going to find a spot that served dinner meals at this hour? This was Seattle, not New York. "I know this fantastic kitchen that serves dinner 24/7."

My eyes flicked over his face, searching for any signs of malicious intent. As I mentioned before, he and I hadn't left one another on peaceful terms… so his kindness was just off to me. But I nodded eventually and he kissed my cheek again before pulling me up from my seat swiftly. "Just let me call Mrs. Knoeb before we go to let her know I won't be back for lunch."

"Mrs. Knoeb?" Jake asked with a reserved look. "Dwyer's mom?" I nodded before looking away, afraid he'd start asking questions. It wasn't easy to date after we broke up- no guy wanted to date Jacob Black's ex-girlfriend, I was basically blacklisted to the locals. At nineteen, it was a pretty low blow beneath the belt. We broke up when I was almost nineteen, him twenty-three- I was in my first year of college, he had just graduated with his masters in machinery. Even if our actual relationship only lasted over a span of three years and some change, we were friends for a while before anything romantic happened, which made things so much more complicated in the end. (24). We knew a guy named Dwyer Knoeb off the reservation, and when Jake left (after I stupidly admitted to hooking up with someone when we broken up for a week), Dwyer was one of the few to bravely date me. It lasted for a mere few weeks, but his mother loved me and offered to put me up at her house while I was "sightseeing" in Seattle, as if I were some foreigner to Washington.

And to think- after a year at University of Arizona, I was seriously considering transferring to a college in Washington just to be near Jake! As stated above, things were very complicated when we called it quits. "Yeah, remember him?" I tried to play it off casually.

"Yeah, you seem to know him personally." There was less animosity in his eyes than there would have been given when we were still together. Jacob was just naturally a jealous person, he'd never grow out of it.

"Well you know Mrs. Knoeb, she's just so friendly." I laughed awkwardly afterward and brushed a stray piece of hair back; why was I sitting here explaining everything to him? Mike didn't even ask these many questions about what I was doing. Jake was not my boyfriend, I could not let him think that for even a second. "But are you sure your boss is alright with you taking the rest of the day off? I'd hate to get you in any kind of trouble, Jake." Even though I was pretty sure Jacob hadn't given up on being a total badass, maybe things were a little different for him now that he had some stability in his life?

Another drop dead gorgeous smirk. "I am my own boss, Bellsie."


	2. Creeped Out

**A/N:**

**BE PREPARED. things get a little weird.**

I awoke some time in the middle of the night, wrapped up in the white cotton sheets and his strong tanned arms. After dinner at his place, we got to talking and catching up with expensive wine and some sliced up fruit- before I knew it, it was already midnight and my head was swimming with all of the memories and thoughts coursing at a million miles a minute. Jacob politely offered to let me stay the night, seeing as he wasn't in any state to drive me back to Mrs. Knoeb's and neither did he want me taking a cab to the other side of town. We promised no funny business at all, and I even put a large pillow between us to somewhat ensure it. It was slightly weird to sleep in the same bed as Jake after so long, but I completely understood what people meant about the "spark" after so long. Earlier, I subconsciously felt the pillow thrown out of the way and my body collected into his grasp. Just like back in the day, I laid still as statue as I pulled a firm pillow from beneath my head and slipped it in my place as I wiggled out of his embrace.

Sure, I loved feeling safe and loved inside of those strong arms… but, this was reality, not some perfect fantasy from a far away land. I still had major financial debt, my dad was still stressed to the max with high blood pressure to boot, and I was over an hour away from my hometown with no real way home. Even though I wasn't intoxicated anymore, I didn't want to risk being pulled over and losing my license and only car… that would ruin me even further! Jacob was always a light sleeper, so I was used to stepping lightly so that I didn't wake him; I used those skills as I moved into the kitchen and poured myself a filtered glass of cold water. It slithered down my throat nicely and left me feeling fresh, like I stepped right out of a shower. _Jesus, even his water was magical to me, _I thought inwardly. I looked down at my attire- I was in a pair of his boxers and an old "Princeton" college shirt, where he told me he took his business courses for college.

When he left Forks, I assumed he was gone to study at a chain of different community colleges- never once did I really entertain the idea that he would make into a huge, prestigious school and then go on to make loads of money as a stockbroker/personal finance consultant. And no where along those lines did I see him the second to the top of a successful company, calling shots and taking on responsibility. The most I really ever thought he'd accomplish was professional surfing or big time drug dealing or something. He was always street smart, hell- I did his math homework when we were in high school! But I never told him the way I felt, I always reassured him that I would follow whatever dream he had. And I did… he was the one that dropped me off before his dream took flight. Or better yet, we let go of each other. Funny how six years can screech on by and everything could seem to flip upside down? I felt like a pathetic 22 year old compared to the successful late twenties man that Jake now was, but it couldn't be helped. Money distinguished us now, just as it did when we were younger.

"You still creep out of bed for cold water, hmm?" Jacob's voice made me jump right out of my skin as he held my backside to him, dipping his nose into my neck for comfort. He sighed comfortably, totally ignoring my shocked persona, and nuzzled the exposed skin softly. "Maybe it was always supposed to be like this?" Was he referring to the only two blissful years that we shared as an actual couple together? If so, he was sorely mistaken.

We were starving, poor kids that grew up in a backwater town full of nay-sayers and nosey old couples; La Push was on its last leg when it came to its economic welfare and Forks was basically ran by my dad, Charlie Swan. I lived as comfortably as possible, but shared every last thing I owned with Jake. I loved him from the first day I met him. "Yeah." I replied breathlessly as his tongue peaked out from his mouth and ran over different crevices of my face and neck. "Jake… I already told you." I bit my lip to contain the moan that wanted so badly to escape my lips. Jake used to love when I was loud and outspoken with my pleasure. "I'm involved with someone else." I told him that before we even sat down for wine and cheese earlier, I didn't want to lead him on in any other way than I already had. What Jacob and I had was great, but it was so long ago and both of us had already moved on with our adult lives. He was a deep infatuation I had when I was sixteen all the way until I was eighteen and in my first year of college- sure, I loved him in the very end, but it wasn't enough. He pushed us way too far, and I realized that the crazy, weird relationship we had could not _possibly _be love. Love wasn't suppose to hurt like that.

Jake bit down roughly on my neck, causing a cry to escape my lips at the intense pain and pleasure he brought to me. Flashes of memories, much like this, came back to me all at once. His domineering, controlling mannerisms left a brandished mark on both my skin and on my mind- he was rough with me because I liked it, and it had always been that way. "Yet you're here with me, in my home- you're dressed in my clothes, we just came from cuddling in my bed." Jacob laughed bitterly as he kissed at the dark red spot he left. "That sounds like involvement to me, Bells. Where is this mystery man, huh? Do I know him?" I hated thinking about my maybe boyfriend while in my ex-boyfriend's arms. It made me feel like a real home wrecker to my own life, and I just couldn't shake the feeling, but neither could I shrug Jake off of me.

"I would rather not talk about it, Jake." I turned around in his grasp, begging him to stop his ministrations and put space between us. "You're right, this is a mistake. I shouldn't have stayed the night, we shouldn't have shared the same bed-"

"No, Isabella." He waved one hand and pinched the bridge of his nose with the other, calming himself down instantly. When he looked up again, he was back to his cool and collected self once more with a light smile playing at his lips. "That's nonsense, we were best friends before anything every happened. We slept in the same play pen as children, why is there such a fuss about a bed now?" I felt awkward and cornered as his eyes became unreadable and his smile grew bigger. Anger and frustration radiated from his body, but his face still lit up with what I could only assume was a fake smile.

That was something he did very often, his mood swings! One moment we would be in a heated battle and the next he was asking what movie we were going to watch at the cinema- back then, I just assumed he was high strung. But now, I was beginning to think that he was bipolar.

For the rest of the night, I slept on the bed while he dozed off on the couch alone. It was just too much to ask of me to think of him strictly as a "friend" again, it was too weird! But then again, I put myself in this situation! I woke late the next morning, regretting my over-consumption of alcohol as soon as the light shone through the open blinds. It felt so early in the morning, but when I glanced to my left and saw that the digital alarm clock read almost noon, I was in a frenzy. Why would he let me sleep in this late? Didn't he realize that I needed to start making my way back to Forks by now, so that I wouldn't catch a snowstorm or impossible rain on my way back? I was fairly irritated until I caught a glimpse of red and green from the living room; I flew out of bed and stormed right into the next room, standing still at the three dozen of long-stemmed red roses. Without thinking, I gushed softly to myself and plucked the attached parchment.

"**Dearest Bella,**

**I am sorry about last night, seeing you again after so long has so many effects on me. You bring out the schoolboy in me, I just want to apologize for my stupidity.**

**I will be off work after six. You can reach me on my personal line after two, when my video conference is over with. I called Mrs. Knoeb to let her know that you'd be staying with me for another day and she agreed it was best for you to not travel anytime soon. **

**Still love me?**

**-Your Jake"**

His words sent me into a silent state of madness because all of these things that he was saying felt oddly familiar… him calling my friend's mother to excuse my presence, sending me flowers as compensation, writing an apology in a card. I wanted to scream, _no, I don't still love you, you asshole!_ But the idiot part of my womanhood swooned and giggled at being treated like a treasure since it wasn't something that necessarily happened everyday in Forks. I thought about a friendly way to say thanks to him, because a kiss was completely out of the question these days. I looked towards the kitchen and was immediately on my way- he loved food, especial home cooked meals. Well, at least he used to! Things weren't so black and white with us anymore, but I knew that a tiger that didn't change their stripes. And Jacob Black was sometimes a man of ritual. His favorite spaghetti dish was cooked and set in a container before one o' clock came around, so I called ahead to his building while I rummaged through some of his things.

His personal secretary answered on the second ring and was polite enough to let me know that he hadn't taken a leave for lunch yet, but that he wasn't to be bothered until exactly 2 when his business was done. I felt slightly guilty for sifting through his closet and drawers, but I really needed another outfit and my old one from yesterday had too many wrinkles and marks for my liking. I knew his sister Becca came through town every once in awhile, he had to have a drawer of her things around somewhere!

But what I stumbled upon was more shocking and frightful than I ever imagined. While the two expensive looking dressers against the walls of his bedroom held nothing but jeans and casual clothes, his walk-in closet housed hundreds of tailored business suits and shiny dress shoes. As I sifted through tuxedos and slacks, I pulled open a cupboard-type door and nearly fell back at the sheer oddity of it. Before me was two shelves, the size of my body, with pictures, small tokens, and two neatly stacked piles of shirts and underwear. The pictures were all of myself and him, and the small trinkets laying around were all semi-recognizable. One was a wilted old flower, and I could have sworn it was the same daisy that I pressed in the middle page of my bible long ago. Another was the promise ring he gave when we first started dating, and another was a lonely fake diamond earring- I threw the other one away long ago, assuming I just lost it.

I was too scared to use any of these clothes, and seeing as they were about four years old I doubted my breasts fit in the shirt or my ass in the jeans. But I was creeped out by the shrine he kept of me in his closet- did he add to it every now and then or what? Sure, we were good friends and all, but we hadn't talked or seen one another in a very long while. What made him think something freaky like this was okay? In a second, I slammed the cupboard shut and slid his suits back along the rack to cover the "secret" cabinet once more. I had no choice but to wear my old outfit now, so when I felt dirty as I slipped into the attire, a small migraine started at the back of my mind. No matter what, I knew I needed to leave this sorry excuse for a "safety net" and head back to Forks once his food was delivered. Jake had always been intense and just a little weird, but never in a million years did I think he'd have a memorabilia of myself!

**A/N:**

**So Jake has a shrine of Bella?**

**Hmm, weird? Not weird?**

**Let's see what happens when she brings lunch.**


	3. Little Things

**A/N:**

**ATTENTION EVERYONE:**

**You can now find me on FACEBOOK. There you can see new banners, early updates, and more easily interact with me as the writer. Also, "LIKE" it please and thank you! It is under "Miss Nae Malfoy".**

I grabbed the two twenty dollar bills he left for me on the counter and saw myself out of his apartment, contemplating the events of everything leading up to now. The more I mulled over it, the less menacing the memorabilia seemed to me. Did that make me crazy? Did that make me naïve or something? Jacob, since the first time I laid eyes on him, had been the type of person that was always so intense and in your face. Even though there was a four year age difference, we grew up so alike and very close. Charlie and Billy were best friends and my mother skipped town on me when I was barely reaching my pubescent years, the time I needed her sorry ass the most. I shook my head to rid myself of the building anger I felt boiling in my veins; thinking about her never failed to bring back those awful feelings of abandonment and bitterness, it wasn't something I hadn't quite gotten over yet. And I was already 22 years old! You'd think ten years was more than enough time for one person to build a bridge and get over it.

The doormen nodded politely in greeting as I walked past him, lunch in a blue knapsack, and I smiled in return. These people were so nice! Before completely disappearing down the street, I looked up at the tall building I spent the night in and I couldn't help but smile. The traitorous thoughts in my head said _my_ Jake lives there- _my_ Jake made it happen for himself! Why was it so hard to remind myself that he wasn't mine anymore, and hadn't been for the last four years? Again, I shook my head and turned towards the windy street and began to hail a cab for myself. Jake left those forty dollars for me to put gas in, probably so I could stop by Mrs. Knoeb's house to get my overnight things… but I couldn't make myself do that just yet. Cabbies were easier and definitely less hassle for me. I wasn't familiar at all with these streets and traffic made for the potential of accidents that much more of a stresser for me. And I was hoping that perhaps after lunch I could make my famous getaway and leave his line of vision for another four years? It wasn't that I hated him or couldn't stand his presence, it was just the opposite! I still had such strong feelings for this man, how was I supposed to think clearly when he was all that I could see?

I didn't want to feel sixteen again, blinded by lust and hormonal feelings. Jake was all hormones, all of the time! I arrived at his building no more than twenty-five minutes later, another five minutes added with elevator wait time and my thoughtless wandering about before finally arriving in front of the lobby of his office. I silently thought to myself how nice it would be to not only have a private office, but to own an attached lobby as well… I could barely afford groceries and gas money at the end of the week! "Hi, my name's Bella. I'm here to see Jacob Black." I announced myself awkwardly to the blank stare on the other side of the wooden desk. The woman, Kaycee, as I remembered her, meet my eyes briefly before nodding and scribbling something down on her notepad. I made sure to say "Bella" this time and not "Isabella", even though I felt foolish doing so. Of course there were a million other Bellas out there, but I sort of expected Jake to only know me.

"Of course." She reached into her desk pulled out an "Express" shopping bag before handing it over to me. "Here, Mr. Black instructed me to take this to you later. But since you're here it seems appropriate that you have it now." I was a little surprised and let my face show it as I peeked into the grey bag and scoped out a pair of dark blue jeans and a white shirt. "Mr. Black gave me your exact sizes, so they should fit perfectly." Even as she said these every day things, her back was so straight and her tone was so numb that I felt as if I were talking to an Android rather a human being.

I smiled at the sweet action of his; he knew I was going to feel gross in my old clothes. Through I felt just a little insecure about a stranger buying my clothes and knowing my exact size, I saw the kind gesture for what it was. "How long of a wait is it to see him?"

Kaycee pursed her lips at me as she settled her elbows on her desk. "His meeting isn't scheduled to be over until ten more minutes, and seeing as he decided to take the video conference in the main Boardroom, he won't be here in his private area for another half hour. You'll have to wait here alone, I'm afraid; I'll be taking my lunch in a few minutes."

I was a little frustrated with the monotonous blondie before me. I called her over an hour ago! Couldn't she have told me this while we were talking on the phone? It'd save me waiting alone in an office for a useless thirty minutes. "And the other two offices?" I pointed my head in the direction of the unmarked door to the left.

Kaycee cleared her throat. "The door on the left is reserved for our seasonal marketer, Peter Williams. The door on the right is a private room, Miss." She gave no real explanation so I gave her a tight smile and went to sit down. There were tons of people milling down the hallways and crowding the elevator, so I skipped on the idea of taking a look around the place. From what Jake explained to me the night before, his title was the Executive Chief Risk Management Officer, working below a very important Mr. Cullen- the same didn't ring a bell to me, but Jake spoke of this man as if he were Jesus reincarnated. He said Mr. Cullen gave him a starting point as general manager to the floor stories beneath where he was now right of out Graduate school- and it took him no time to win the good graces. Jake climbed his way up the ladder and became executive to the very man that he idolized most; it filled me with immense pride that Jacob was fairly young to have such a high position, and not to mention the pay grade was awesome!

It was like everything was working out perfectly for Jacob and his new life here in Seattle. As she promised, she was gone within minutes and left me to listlessly stare at the walls and wonder about everything going on. Was Charlie alright in the house by himself? Was he microwaving the three designated meals and premade and left in the fridge for him? I hated to admit it but living with my dad was a daily chore, but I loved him so dearly. I left Forks for my first year of college, right after Jake and I had our huge falling out, but I only survived my second semester before I came crawling back from Phoenix. I missed the comfort of my dad and the familiarity I felt wherever I went in Forks, and I couldn't take the hot, dry weather in Arizona.

And of course, every single guy reminded me of Jake. After what felt like an endless amount of waiting, I stood up and paced around the lobby. The walls were a nice crème color and I found no problem in observing some of his more interesting hanging portraits and historical pieces; I never got to see this deep side of him, or was this some sort of creative interior director that set this stuff up? I laughed at that- Jake didn't even let me tidy up his room when we were dating, would he really let some random stranger walk into his work place and fix everything up? Even the furniture matched with the trimming of the walls and the nude carpet was soft enough to take a nap on; Jacob was _not_ that thoughtful. I pushed on the cheery wood double doors, not expecting them to even budge, but when they did I stumbled right into his office. I was twisted on the ground, looking up at the dark, quiet area for a few more seconds than necessary before standing upright and dusting myself off.

I turned the light switch on and gasped as the room illuminated right before my eyes; I really didn't have a careful look around yesterday, I was so scared out of my mind just being here. There was a fully equipped bar on one side with a lounge chair and a leather recliner, then a full-sized armoire filled with glass objects, sports memorabilia, and more fancy looking things. His massive desk and even bigger black, swivel chair drew my attention immediately. I took a few steps towards it and touched the edges of the desk gingerly and then fingered the spine of the chair; a few more steps would have taken me to full-length window, floor-ceiling style. I couldn't imagine constantly working with my back against that thing- what if the glass shattered and you fell right through the large hole in the air? It was a very long way down! I shut my eyes against my scary thoughts and turned back around. I spotted two doors and checked the first one- it was just a square-ish walk in closet about 5 by 7 feet tall filled with what I could only assume was clothes in the event that he stayed here all night. I didn't doubt it; he really was a hard worker with night owl tendencies, making for the perfect employee to sleep at work. But changing and continuing on the next day, no shower or breakfast? That wasn't a life at all.

The other door was a restroom, with fancy upholstery, marble countertops, and white tiled floors- it mirrored his bathroom at home as well. I started changing into my new clothes when I spotted a new pair of underwear and bra inside of the bag; my heart soared as I congratulated both him and his nasal-voiced secretary. The shower was very inviting as I pulled my hair into a high bun and jumped in for a few minutes, scrubbing down and then jumping out to get dried up. So, he did have a place to shower after all… it really should have been a no-brainer for me, Jake loved to shower multiple times a day. He used to say it could calm him down, wake him up, and give him answers about life in every aspect; I showered once a day, sometimes every other day when I was doing hair treatments to my thick locks. After throwing on the crisp white V-neck and jeans, I looked around his spare drawers for anything I could put on my feet- I had a weird phobia about my bare feet touching things, when we would sleep together I wouldn't allow him to be barefoot. It was weird, yes, but Jacob got sex out of it so he never stopped to care. With just a little more luck on my side, I found a pair of socks folded together at the bottom of the sink. I splashed some water on my reddening face before dabbing it with a cloth as I walked from the restroom to his office again, only stopping when I heard a fork drop on a plate.

A quick gasp escaped my mouth when I looked up and saw Jacob leaning against his desk, with the plate of spaghetti to his lips in a guilty manner. "Jake!" I called out indignantly, trying my hardest to mask the stupid smile that formed at my lips. I knew he'd love a good ol' home cooked meal again, seeing as I wasn't all that great of a cook back then. For my dad's sake, I _had_ to learn how to make edible meals after awhile! But I should have figured Jake was too impatient to wait for me to start eating, he really lacked those chivalry skills when he needed them most. "Really?" I rubbed it in some more as I padded over to his desk.

"Bella… as soon as I walked in, it was all I could smell!" He was fighting his case with vigor, but with a mouth full of spaghetti noodles I just couldn't take him serious. When he slurped up his food and wiped his mouth with a napkin I brought, he tried again. "I could hear that you were in the shower and keep myself from the temptation of wanting to join you," he gave me a devilish smirk at that; "I ate to keep the hormonal monster at bay."

I had to laugh at that, but the problem was that I couldn't stop laughing when I felt it was enough. My mind replayed his words out, over and over again, until it just seemed ridiculous of me to be laughing outright in his face. "Oh, shut up." I finally said with a shake of my head before plopping down in his comfy chair and pulling out my share of food. We ate in content silence before a few different ideas and conversation topics popped into my head. "So… I was thinking, I might have to cut my visit short here."

Before I could continue onto my reasoning, he butted in. "Why?" It was more of a shot out demand rather than a simple one worded question.

I felt almost cornered as he put his finished plate down and eyed me with a concentrated look. Without thinking, I set my plate down as well and swallowed nervously. "Well, Jake, I mean I love being here with you and catching up on everything- and while I know that there is so much more to talk about and all, I have a home and a life to get back to. I work at Newton's Creamery, he's going to bite my head off if I call in for another day-"

He looked almost relieved as I said this. "Is that what all of your fuss is about? You're still so silly, Bells, I can call for you and I guarantee they'll find no problem with you-"

"No!" The word came out a lot louder and angrier than I ever meant it to, but it was a reaction I had been holding in for so long. He used to do that so much when we were younger, calling for me and excusing me without my consent! I hated it, he did it so often! I was an adult now, with my own responsibilities. "I just mean, these are my daily routines that I can't ignore anymore. It was one great day in ignorant bliss with you, but I've got a hungry dad, dirty house, and probably a starving dog as well to return to! If I could stay here in paradise going down memory lane and talking about our future forever, I so would." I cracked a smile at the thought of talking about all of that with him, on an infinite scale.

"I know you have a financial burden, Isabella, and I know that's why you came all the way to Seattle to see me after so long." With just that one statement, he broke me and brought me down to size; like the shattered million-piece figure I was, I hunched down in his chair and brought my hands to my face. It was just like Jake to know exactly how I felt and exactly the situation I was in. "Let me help you, please." His hands went to my face and held it up to him, but I couldn't find it within myself to uncover my eyes. I felt weak and stupid for cracking beneath the pressure; didn't I repeat my speech over and over again on the car ride to Seattle? Maybe it was the wine from last night or perhaps it was the way his cologne smelt, but I felt myself begin to lean into him slowly. He took the hint, as he was the most observant man I had yet to meet, and lifted me from the seat I resided in and brought my less-than-limp form to him. He situated me beside him, our bums teetering on the edge of his mahogany desk. "I have made it clear that I would give you whatever you needed, whatever it is you want. Take the hand I'm offering, I promise I want absolutely nothing in return." His black eyes went soft and sensitive so quickly, I felt so drawn to him and everything he seemed to be promising me.

I fully uncovered my face and sniffled as I looked up at him; he was so tall and handsome, had I ever really noticed it before? And his smell… I never fully appreciated it until he was gone for what I presumed was forever, it was only then that I realized how much it felt like home. It was in that moment of hugging his old t-shirt to my cold, shaking body in the middle of my dark room one lonely night that I truly knew _he_ was my home. _He_ was where I belonged, we owned a major part of each other and carried those pieces of property around with us on a daily basis. So when he left for Chicago and I stayed in Washington, he took a part of me and ran with it. I felt the last of a resolve I had within me slip away so unabashedly, so swiftly that Jacob was the only object keeping me upright.

Without thought, I reached up and brought his face down to my level- there were so many different emotions playing on his face (which was rare, seeing as he was too good at hiding his emotions) and I knew I was just the same. "I thought about you every single day." I whispered my confession; as if it were a deadly secret I knew I would pay for one day.

I could see Jacob visibly swallow before leaning his face further, resting our cheeks against each other. His aftershave was strong and assaulted my nostrils like a ravenous storm washing up on shore. "You said you hated me." I had to squint my eyes shut against his words, only because they were true and defying. I did say I hated him, but I was young and stupid at that time- I was angry for what he was doing to _us_.

"You left me all alone." Our one sentence confessions left no room for argument, though there was a lengthy explanation attached by flimsy, thin strings.

"You didn't come with me." His stronger rebuttal allowed for one of those annoying, leaky tears to slip from my locked eyelids.

"You shoved me across the room." I pushed that embarrassing fact out of my mouth for the first time in such a long while; actually I hadn't ever even told my best friend that piece of information, it was just too much to say aloud.

"You said you never loved me in the first place." Jake let out in a low voice, causing me to throw my arms around his neck and hug him as tightly as I possibly could in my condition. I felt weak so near him, yet so protected and safe at the same time. He made me feel good about being afraid, as if it were the most normal sensation in the world.

"I always loved you." There, the rigor of confessions leapt from my lips and into his ear, as I brought my mouth right to his earlobe. It wasn't a romantic embrace we were caught in, our history was too muddled with dirt and cracked glass for that so soon, but it was a hug and endearing words of true friends reunited once more.

This, above all, was what I missed for all of these years- perhaps what I began missing the moment we made our situation into something more. If I could go back in time, I would keep us best friends until the end of time. Sex was just wonderful with him and there were certain perks, like his willingness to do _anything_ in trade for it. But that's what severely destroyed our friendship to shreds, like some sort of sick, twisted hurricane. I hugged him tighter to me, promising myself to never let anything happen to our best friendship again.


End file.
